5 Signs a Widower is Serious About Your Relationship
His wife’s death had also left him alone in mourning, and he’s now interested in you! How can you tell if he’s serious about your relationship? Is this the right time to get into a relationship with someone who has just gone through a traumatic loss?
Let us help you determine if he’s serious about your relationship by considering the five signs we’ve identified below.
1) He wants to meet your family
Suppose you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level. In that case, it can be nerve-wracking to introduce him to your family. If he wants you around his children and other family members, he’s also invested in making sure they like him. This is especially true if there are elderly family members who may have stronger feelings about marriage than others. They’ll put pressure on him to make sure things move forward.
Suppose there are no elderly family members around. In that case, his loved ones will step up and grill him themselves if he seems hesitant about taking things further. Either way, he should be open to sharing you with his loved ones—including parents—and their opinions of him matter whether or not he gets taken seriously as a partner candidate.
2) He asks you what you need from him
After losing his wife, it’s common for a widower to feel immense guilt. Often he feels like he failed his wife and that she died because of something he did or didn’t do. His guilt can lead him to treat you as though you were his late wife to make up for not saving her life.
He might want to make sure you’re comfortable and happy at all times, so if things are bothering you, ask him what he can do to improve things around your home or in your relationship. If he asks you what you need from him, he’s already trying to be more considerate than most men after experiencing such a loss.
It would be critical to enjoy and acknowledge those who go out of about there way to care for you, even though they’re not perfect. It takes time for someone who has experienced such a loss to learn to be in a healthy relationship again. Be patient with him and try not to take his mistakes personally. If he makes any mistakes, try talking with him about them rather than assuming they are intentional acts of malice against you.
3) He makes and keeps plans with you
A widower may seem awkward or shy in your presence, especially if he’s still trying to get used to life after his late wife. He might not call when he says he will or may cancel plans on short notice. But eventually, and with time and patience, you should see him begin to socialize with friends again—and you should see him schedule plans with you.
After all, if you’re going to marry him, regularly being around friends and family is one of life’s greatest joys. He opens up: Widowers often prefer talking about their late wives instead of getting into new relationships right away; talking more freely about her death helps them cope with their loss. If he shares stories about his late wife but never mentions you, that could be a red flag.
He introduces you to others: If there are people in his life who are important to him (his children, for example), then those people need to know about you. He wants them to meet you means that he values your relationship enough to want others involved. His children accept and like you: It takes time for everyone involved in a new romantic relationship—especially between two people who have lost spouses—to adjust and become comfortable with each other.
4) He speaks highly of you to his friends
If you’re seeing a widower, odds are he speaks fondly of you to his friends and other people in his life. This means that he wants others to know how happy he is with you. He may not always say it outright, but having an outside opinion on whether or not he should stay with you is essential for him. If his friends approve of what they see, perhaps it’s worth pursuing further with him.
His friends will have good insight into who he is as a person. If they like you, the chances are good that you’ll be able to maintain a solid relationship with them. The opposite can also be true if his friends disapprove of who he’s dating. In either case, pay attention to those around him—they may have more insight than one would think.
5) He asks you to be his partner/girlfriend
When he starts to refer to you as his partner or asks you to be his girlfriend, it’s time to celebrate! Even if he hasn’t officially asked you to move in with him yet, there are many other ways to show that he’s committed. Don’t get too excited just yet, though—he might not be ready for another relationship so soon after losing his wife. Your job is to encourage him and help him through these tough times, especially when it comes time for joint decisions like moving in together.
Talk with him often and discuss how life will change once you move in together, whether it’s only temporary or permanent. Make sure you both feel comfortable with your decision before making any big moves. If he doesn’t want to commit yet, don’t push him into doing something he isn’t ready for. He needs time to grieve and heal before jumping into another relationship. While waiting for him to heal on his terms, you can continue dating, but remember that everyone heals at their own pace.
Some people in life will make you feel safe, protected, and loved. These are exceptional qualities that can only be found in very special people; if you have been lucky enough to find such a person, it means you should treasure them. Widowers are no different from these feelings, so you need to learn how to recognize when they like you. There are five signs he’s serious about your relationship.